To your "oj"

I once wrote it to you - and it's still very very relevant. Maybe even more so. You still are free from me.. and I still love you :)

"... I was wrong.

apparently, not only in my feelings for you and Pazit, but also regarding my own feelings.

I didn't want to tell you this at all, like "it's my own problems", but now it felt kind of unfair (towards you) (hiding, I mean)

on one hand, I was hurting. really, badly hurting.
on the other hand, I was trying to understand, "where is the bug in this algorithm", because if it hurts so much, it means I'm doing something that wouldn't be of joy to anyone.
finally I realized it hurts so much because I was like trying to cut on myself. You're flowing in my veins, <...>. I can't just like that take my blood and replace it. I

never expected it to be so strong and so affecting me, but it came, somehow. and now to close on it is to close my own soul. I can't do it, I'll live with that.

But

you can be free from it

I started a blog yesterday, where I'm writing what I would like to tell you if we were in a relationship I would like it to be. this way I will be able to "vent". and you won't feel bombarded by anything.

your name is not mentioned there, neither is mine

it's just "you", "me" and my writings.

so on your side you can take it the way it's easier for you.

and I'll try to live it the way it's easier for me.

"if there're stars out there, it means somebody's needed them"

the same about my feeling. if it came, I won't fight it anymore."

What a song..

in the beginning - read every other line...

The All-American Rejects
"Dance inside"

You don't have to move, you don't have to speak
lips for biting.
You're staring me down, a glance makes me weak
eyes for striking
Now I'm twisting up when I'm twisted with you
brush so lightly
and time trickles down, and I'm breathing for two
squeeze so tightly.

I'll be fine, you'll be fine.
this moment seems so long
Don't waste now, precious time
we'll dance inside the song

What makes the one to shake you down?
Each touch belongs to each new sound
Say now you want to shake me too
Move down to me, slip into you

She sinks in my mind as she sheds through her skin
touch sight tastes like fire
hands do now what eyes no longer defend
hands to fuel desire

I'll be fine, you'll be fine
this moment seems so long
Don't waste now, precious time
we'll dance inside the song

My (S) is missing your (K)s! ;)

My belly, too. :)

not to speak about that part of me that keeps asking, "where is <..>"...

It feels like your call to me today :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eI6aDJ5ZTjY

embedding not possible :(

A nice channel for conversation :)

Thank you for the music, dear.

<Kiss> to that part of you that is my favorite... I wonder what you think it is.. :)

It certainly does.. :)

"You got that certain something
What you give to me
Takes my breath away"

(Aerosmith)

(please, honey, send to me some of your new music..)

A Hymn to your זין

I was going now through the appreciation process by AH, where one thinks of all kinds of things they feel they can feel appreciative for, and suddenly thought of it. Oh, what waves rose me!

I never told you this before, but through all my life I've always felt too big in one place, too small and not-for-that-at-all :) in another, and too easily disgusted in the third. Your זין made me feel welcomingly tight, fitting-like-a-glove, in one place, wonderfully (eagerly) accepting in another, and enjoying every inch of the surface and every nuance of the taste, with the third. So no wonder I think of it with such ..nice feelings. :)

So I felt it entering me - missionarily or with my legs on your shoulders, feeling it filling me with such a strength and.. confidence and pleasure.

I felt it entering my tusik, rippling waves of fantastic, fire-like, pleasure through my whole body.

I could feel with my mouth its smoothness and hardness, its perfect shape and adorable size. The feeling of every its tiny skin fold under my tongue, the glance smoothness of the head and the mat smoothness of the shaft..

And I felt oh-so-appreciative to it. :)

Does it feel me now? :)
Does it get closer to me? :)
Please tell it my warmest hello. :)

p.s. I guess, my next thought will be about your tongue.. :))

Let me see you strip, you can get a tip

Boy I like you just the way you are ;)

Tenderness..

All this tenderness again towards you.. Feel like flying now.... With you, to you, from my heart to yours :)

Oh my tiger :)

"Risin' up, back on the street
Did my time, took my chances
Went the distance, now I'm back on my feet
Just a man and his will to survive

So many times, it happens too fast
You change your passion for glory
Don't lose your grip on the dreams of the past
You must fight just to keep them alive."

Survivor, Eye Of The Tiger

Accordingly to the radio -

"I want you. Come here."

were the first words said on the phone. :)

<shouting your name here>!!!

I want to run to you and to hug you bumping into you, to get suddenly into your arms....... feel your arms around me.. feel your body close-close to me.. feel your smell, so mine, so masculine, so yours.. feel your hardness - your body hardness, darling, not yet the hardness where you thought :) but then there, too.......... honey honey how much how very much I need you I love you I live you...................

Daily

So nice it is when I can see everywhere here ..like your footsteps - here, there, everywhere.. :) ..and not feel pain, feel only joy and tenderness. Honey, honey, you gave me so much, you're so so much for me.....

So reminds what you are with me..

(for the word "love" - put something that feels better for you :)

Lovely Is The Feelin' Now
Fever, Temperatures Risin' Now
Power (Ah Power) Is The Force The Vow That Makes It Happen It Asks No Questions Why (Ooh)
So Get Closer (Closer Now) To My Body Now Just Love Me 'Til You Don't Know How (Ooh)

Keep On With The Force Don't Stop
Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough
Keep On With The Force Don't Stop
Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough

Touch Me And I Feel On Fire
Ain't Nothin' Like A Love Desire (Ooh)
I'm Melting (I'm Melting)
Like Hot Candle Wax Sensation (Ah Sensation)
Lovely Where We're At (Ooh)
So Let Love Take Us Through The Hours I Won't Be Complanin' 'Cause This Is Love Power (Ooh)

Keep On With The Force Don't Stop
Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough

Heartbreak Enemy Despise
Eternal (Ah Eternal) Love Shines In My Eyes (Ooh) So Let Love Take Us Through The Hours I Won't Be Complanin' (No No)
'Cause Your Love Is Alright, Alright

Keep On With The Force Don't Stop
Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough

The feeling is...

..you're in my heart.